Thursday, December 13, 2012

Christmas 2012



Well another year has passed us by.  It is crazy how being busy makes time fly, I thought it required throwing the clock!  Lets see how things went around here.....

Linnea turned 12 in January.  She survived the 6th grade and made the "A" honor roll once and the "B" honor roll 3 times.  She continues to excel at Math, thankfully she got Thomas' math genes and not mine. In April she had her 1st communion at our new church along with her cousins.  She started confirmation classes in September and is learning a lot of things she missed by not attending Sunday school over the years.  I'm thankful our pastor is open to lots of questions. On Thanksgiving she completed her second 5k Turkey Trot benefiting IRIS.  She remained relatively healthy until school started and then once again we began fighting with all the bugs.  After some testing we found a vitamin D deficiency and once again her Iron very low.  This has been a ongoing problem since she was a infant.  Hopefully now with the right combo of vitamins we have her on the right track.  She is very much into music, especially the 80's, who knew our cassette tapes would find a second life! You can find her these days in her room writing and rocking out to her stereo or like a young teenage girl, on the phone or now days on the computer emailing and instant messaging.

Ulrik turned 9 in September.  He has continued to grow, grow, grow.  I'm hoping we have slowed down for just a little while.  He is patiently waiting for basketball to be offered through school so he can give it a try.  His feet are now wearing men's shoes, I'm not sure he can swing track with his gunboats!  Ulrik had a great year of second grade and was very excited for 3rd grade since he has his same teacher from last year.  He adores Mrs. Tuma and works well with her teaching style.  He continues to be all boy, this summer he got sidetracked by a nasty infection in his knee after a "Danger Dude" moment on his cousins bike. It took almost 10 days of heavy antibiotics to get him back up to cruising speed.  Thankfully "chicks dig scars" because he has another keeper.  Right now he is starting to learn to play the guitar and he is busy with finger knitting, its a start, hopefully next year he will move up to real needles which will make Grandma Carol very happy. We are also still quite the legomaniac, building many creations from the floor of his room.  He still very much enjoys his superheroes and shooting the "emenies." Very rarely will you find him sitting still, unless he's knitting or reading.

Annika turned 4 in August.   We very quickly picked up on potty training in June and haven't looked back, this was awesome considering the issues we have had with her kidneys which delayed timing abit.  She started preschool in September and has quickly picked up her alphabet and numbers.  She loves to do her "homework" and write her letters and numbers.  She really enjoys being crafty with her scissors, paper, and crayons.  We are starting to learn to tell time, and to learn to read also.  She very much enjoys annoying Linnea, a task I think she takes pride in. Ulrik and Annika enjoy annoying each other also, but you can find them often building with the pink Legos and chatting. In October we ventured back to Children's to see how her kidney reflux has progressed, unfortunately it appears we will be having surgery next year some time to have a ureteral reimplantation on both kidneys.  We did discover that her right kidney is tipped which could be part of the reason healing has stalled on that side.  Good news those is the left kidney has completely healed. She continues to be the spitting image of her father with the curly red hair and the spitfire, stubborn attitude to match.

Thomas continues at Xcel Energy, he has been with the company for 13 years this past June. For Easter this year I was able with some help to give him a big surprise. His Dad came and visited from Georgia.  He was very, very surprised! This was a wonderful visit for all.  The kids enjoyed teaching Grandpa how to bowl and play Ping-Pong on the Wii, and Thomas got to spend some time reminiscing with Dennis.  I continue to be the CLO(Chief Life Officer) of the house.  I keep busy with keeping track of everyone and everything.  With some help from the kids this years projects were mostly outdoors.  Ulrik and Linnea helped transplant 2 trees to the backyard and plant Grandma’s tree in the front yard.  It took them over 2 hours to dig the hole.  We almost completed the rock garden but we ran out of rock.  We planted tomatoes, peppers, pumpkins, and squash. We were able to can 40 jars of salsa from the garden this year. We only had 1 pumpkin make it and we picked the squash too soon, but we are learning.  We had a lot of busy days this summer with my nephew Matthew(8) and niece Piper(2) still coming over for daycare.  I helped out with crafts at VBS and  got a new partner in crime at the same time. At the beginning of November the flu hit our house and knocked me down.  I ended up with a ear infection that spread to the surrounding tissue and nerves.  It was a little frightening when the doctor tells you not to be home alone.  The right side of my head was numb, I had no voice and  had limited use of my right arm.  I had my first and I hope only MRI.  Thankfully we caught things in time before surgery became necessary.  With antibiotics and our chiropractor I'm almost back to fighting shape. The kids enjoyed this time as we all camped out on the couch sick together and I had no voice to tell them what to do!   I have been teaching myself how to crochet with mixed results. I started making dishcloths and have moved onto hats and scarves.  I attempted a pair of fingerless gloves, but after the first one, not being able to fit anyone but Bigfoot, I decided to not attempt mittens anytime soon.  The kids and I completed the "Little House on the Prairie" series this winter and are now working on "The Boxcar Children" We enjoy our reading time.  I continue to volunteer with IRIS.  Thomas and I once again manned the kitchen with wonderful help for the pancake breakfast.  My biggest contribution with some help from my Mom was using my knitting machine to make 500 blankets for a training session. I was literally up to my elbows in yarn and blankets!

At the end of July we a wonderful family vacation to Itasca State Park again.  We took Grandma Carol with and everyone RELAXED!!!  We went to the Mississippi Headwaters quite a few times. The goal was to not leave the park except for 1 day and we succeeded.  We experienced the headwaters in the morning, afternoon, and at dusk. It is amazing how nature changes so much depending on the time of day.  The kids enjoyed picking up rocks for the garden and walking in the Mississippi, they also enjoyed plenty of pool time at the cabin.  Many hours were spent enjoying mother nature and her bounty.  Thomas and the kids went hiking and again climbed Aitin Fire tower. Linnea has made it to the top twice, Ulrik made it further then last time.  We were fortunate to have wonderful weather the entire week, it rained starting at 2am the day we left.

We hope you have had a wonderful year and been blessed with good days.  The road might not always be smooth, but its still a fun ride.


 
 
 
 
 
 
Christmas Wish


The heart of Christmas is hope
We need hope.
We need Christmas!
The New Year gives us time.
We need time to grieve.
But most of all to Heal.

I wish you the gift of peace



from an aching heart;
I wish you the gift of

strength for the day ~
I wish you the gift of recognition,
I wish you the gift of remembrance,
I wish you the gift of care,
I wish you the gift of belonging,
These are the gifts I wrap in prayer,
And loving send your way.

May the memories of this Season
Come on Gentle Wings and
Bring you, your family and friends
Love and Peace.


Merry Christmas from heaven,



Zachary Andrew
 
 
 
 
 

Linnea 7th Grade
Ulrik 3rd Grade
Annika - 1st day of preschool
Christmas card picture
 
We hope you all have a wonderful holiday season! 
Love and Peace
Libby and the Crew

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Well its another cloudy,cool day here in Veseli, but I'm snuggled down in the house where it is a balmy 70 degrees.  It feels like there is a window open somewhere in the house which just tells me, I need to finish sealing us in for the winter with the help of 3M and a hairdryer.
         Annika has been trying to convince me she could wear her new winter boots to preschool.  I convinced her to wear her sudo suede boots that served as winter boots last year because we had no snow!!  Unfortunately we have had our last wearing on them as all the kids feet are deciding to grow within weeks of each other.  Linnea is wearing a womans size 9 and Ulrik is a mens 7!!  Right now my nearly 13 year old and 9 year old can wear the same size shoe!!!!!  Crazy how school starts and then they grow.  Thankfully I've learned over the years that its not worth buying clothes before school starts because they will start to grow on the second week.
    We have been enjoying the fall weather with great fanfare.  The kids get bundled up and head outdoors for a hour or so in the afternoon which helps me to get dinner ready and helps me even more to get some energy out.  If life works out this trend will be continuing for awhile. Last night was pleasant for trick or treating.  I handed out candy while Thomas and the kids were treating with some friends of ours.  It was nice that the weather cooperated and everyone was done before we started to lose feeling in all fingers.
    Thanksgiving is fast approaching, which means Christmas will be even faster approaching.  Ive been very busy learning to crochet so I can give the kids the one of a kind presents that I enjoy making for them.  Whether they are truly appreciated or not, to me its the thought that goes into them.  Christmas isn't all about how many Lego sets or gift cards you can get and I feel its important to remind the kids of this OFTEN!  Thanksgiving is bringing us together for the IRIS turkey trot.  Ulrik is the most excited about doing his second 5k. I think he would enjoy doing one a month if possible. 
     The last year seems like a blur in so many ways.  I guess that's what happens when you are flying by the seat of your pants most of the time.  We have had birthdays, anniversaries, good days, bad days, special moments, vacation, the passing of the school year and the starting of another.  It just seems obscene to consider it is the first of November already.  I feel I still have so many things to do before I can recycle the calendar.  Theres rooms to be painted, pictures to take and hang, more crafts to start and finish, more books to read, more things to show the kids................... but life is really a perpetual calendar.  It just changes when another event pops up and you have to adjust to having a real teenager in the house or a official preschooler(who thinks she's a teenager), or you cross something else of the "honey do list". Its life and it doesn't stop even if you want it to, just to let you off and catch your breath.  I am truly thankful for each and every moment of it and I don't always stop to look at it.  Finding a moment to stop and look can be exhausting, just looking up and finding you are smack in the middle of "that moment" is the reward.
    I had a moment of complete and utter silence a couple weeks ago, it was only me, the house and the dog.  I can count on one hand how many times in the last 13 years I have had moments like these.  It disturbed me. I felt out of my element.  I love the hulabaloo of everyday life, I enjoy the sounds of the kids bickering, wrestling, giggling, spitting toothpaste in the sink, or sleeping.  It was just me and me and my thoughts alone are consuming, I don't like it.  But on the never ending river of grief I had a bit of a "aha" moment.  How many times had I wondered if things had been different if Zachary had lived, how many times have I wished he were here?  But I realized that he has lived, through me I have kept his name in our house, I have told his siblings about him, I have seen him in each and everyone of the kids. He is here with us, in spirit, in my thoughts daily, in my prayers at night.  The world may not be able to physically see him or touch him, but for me (the wacko typing this) he is here. He helped pick out 3 of the craziest, wonderful kids.  He has helped grab his brother by the scruff of his neck to keep him from breaking a limb in one of his "DangerDude" moments.  He has held Annikas hand as she went though her first surgery and all of her nasty testing. He has helped Linnea to be inquisitive about life.  And he has helped hold our hands when we need a little comforting. 
      Zachary is not a missing piece of our family but rather the glue that helps to keep it stuck together. 
     This is my birthday present to myself.  I am the large dragonfly and there are four small ones.  Each represent my children.  Two blue ones for my boys, two pink ones for my girls.
                                            

                                              MY CHILDREN AND ME ALWAYS.
                                           

  
  

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Intentions are like (bleep) we all have them.

     Well intentions have gone out the window.  I think I'm going to and then something different comes along or gets in the way.  For my sanity I think I'm going to just start remembering I fly by the seat of my pants more days then not.  Life gets hectic even when all you've done is sit on the couch playing with yarn all day.  I would say I'm going to try harder but I always say that and disappoint myself so I wont say it anymore (well at least for a week or so). 
    So life has been busy, no surprise.  Easter we had a great surprise Thomas'  Dad came to visit.  It had been almost 5 years since we saw him last.  We had a great week together and Annika even warmed up to him by the end of the week.  She is still questioning me about his house and his pool and if he will fill it up before we get there next summer, boy is she going to be shocked to find out its not her little kiddie pool! 
     Spring/summer is still arriving here so its been try to make the yard pretty time.  I'm thinking the neighbors are wondering what the light is in the kitchen all night, its a GROW LIGHT!!!  I was a little slow this year and needed some help.  I have my morning glories sprouting, so now I just need to get my new planters ready.  Today I got the pansies, petunias and tomatoes planted.  Hopefully with some help this weekend I can get the old laundry tub painted and planted for the tomatoes also.  Hard part is after trying to be wonder woman and get so much beautifying done I severely sprained my pectoral muscles on both sides of my chest. 
     After moving 3000 pounds of rock, which was in 50 pound bags.  I moved it from the pallets at the store to the car, from the car to the driveway, from the driveway to the yard, and then had to dump them all out in their places. Things are looking great but my arms don't go over my head, oh wait they don't like me to do much at all.  Lifting a clothes basket or 30 pound kid is excruciating.  Bonus to all this after  5 hours in the ER found out I'm healthy, my heart works great (2 EKGS and lots of blood to prove it), I don't have blood clots (chest xray and ultrasounds on both legs) and my blood pressure is excellent ( I have the bruises from the auto cuff).  So if this weather will hold and I can keep stretching maybe by mothers day ill be back to me.  
       The kids have been soaking up every ray of sunshine they can. We love sun!!!!  They have tolerated the cloudy windy days also, and after last night I have a feeling that Ulrik will be out in the rain.  In front of our house is a hill with a drainage ditch across the bottom.  This is made extra swampy by our sump pump draining there.  Ulrik has figured out how to safely navigate through this muck with his bike without wiping out.  Now he is working on how to jump the sump hose and head down the ditch without having to lift his bike over it.  Linnea joined in this task also.  I'm sure my laundry pile is going to be increasing a bit! Summer vacation starts in 14 days, I am trying to plan some small day trips to parts of our state that can be interesting.  And I also volunteered to help out with Vacation Bible School.  I'm looking forward to both items.   
     Mothers day is approaching quickly.  On Sunday the 6th mothers such as myself have our own day of recognition.  It is International Bereaved Mothers Day.  For all he mothers of baby's lost.  I'm hoping the weather will hold to be able to sail a sky lantern at dusk.  I'm not sure where I'm going to set this off, after looking at the cemetery its going to have to be very calm to not have to worry about the trees.  Hopefully it will work out well otherwise maybe at dawn.  Mothers day is always a bittersweet holiday because of Zachary.  But I also have to think of my other beautiful children.  Its wonderful to know now that on the 6th I can concentrate on Zachary and on the 13th celebrate with the other kids.  For my first mothers day after Zachary, Thomas gave me a ring it says MOM on the outside and has a row of diamonds on top.  It is now welded to my new wedding ring.  It has been my constant ring.  Its nothing extravagant but it means so much to me.  Possibly even more then the emerald ring he also gave me that day.  Its just a constant reminder of all we went through to get to that day, to today and tomorrow and so on........